‘Just Get On With It …’

We’ve all gotten well-meaning advice at times that boil down to “just get on with it.” Just overcome your doubts and put yourself out there. Just stop procrastinating and sitting on the couch. Just ignore that inner voice telling you that you’re an imposter and push forward anyway.

While the intent behind this kind of advice may be good, the problem is it can trivialise very real barriers that hold many people back. Telling someone to force themselves to do something despite paralysing self-doubt or intense anxiety often has the opposite effect - it reinforces those feelings of shame and worthlessness.

What many don’t realise is obstacles like imposter syndrome, lack of self-confidence, fear of failure or emotional blocks around getting started are very real for huge numbers of people. They can’t simply be brushed off through sheer willpower. There are even studies showing the more we try to suppress unwanted thoughts and feelings, the louder they become.

Pushing too hard also risks emotional and physical burnout over time. When we don’t address the root issues and merely try forcing our way through, those issues often intensify until they become full-blown crises rather than subsiding.

A More Compassionate Approach

Rather than just insisting people get over their hang-ups, we need to meet them where they're at and offer real tools tailored to their situation.

Getting to the root of self-limiting beliefs with self-inquiry, speaking words of kindness to ourselves when we fail, seeking support to deal with past pain, breaking big goals down into smaller tasks, rewarding tiny wins - these are the kinds of nuanced approaches required for real change. While grit and perseverance are important, compassion and understanding are just as key.

At the heart of my work is compassion, empathy and meeting people where they are at.  Progress often happens step-by-step, not through forcing ourselves against intense inner resistance. With empathy, patience and practical support, I can help move forward in an emotionally sustainable way.