What Boundary Could You Put In Place Today?

When it comes to setting healthy boundaries—around our time, workload, relationships, finances, you name it—most of us struggle. Even when we know establishing boundaries will reduce stress and improve our lives, we still have trouble maintaining them. Why is that?

At the core, many of us subconsciously believe we don’t “deserve” boundaries. We were raised to be “nice” at all costs or fear seeming selfish if we set limits. Additionally, women in particular contend with social and cultural conditioning that encourages accommodating others’ needs first.

On top of internalised messaging, there are external pressures that make maintaining boundaries an ongoing battle. From demanding workloads to loved ones’ expectations around our availability, there are constantly forces pushing against our time and energy limits.

So how do we start setting the boundaries our wellbeing depends on?

Here are some ideas:

✍🏻 Get clear on your top priorities. Connect to what matters most in each area of your life. Be able to articulate these priorities to guide where to set firmer boundaries.

✍🏻 Give yourself permission to favour your needs unapologetically, even at the risk of disappointing someone. Your health and needs matter.

✍🏻 Apply RSVP rules. “Respond, don’t react” gives you time to check that a request aligns with your priorities before saying yes. “Value Self first” puts your wellbeing first when deciding what to agree to and what’s negotiable.

✍🏻 Practice conscious communication. Communicate your evolving boundaries and availability transparently yet compassionately. Say no with love, not guilt or shame.

✍🏻 Notice situations that cause you to abandon boundaries and choose a different response. Have empathy for yourself if you regress sometimes too.

✍🏻 Revisit regularly. As conditions and priorities shift, reset boundaries around your time, energy, communication preferences, relationship dynamics, and financial priorities.

While establishing firm boundaries is hard work, the benefits for your mental and physical health are well worth it.

What boundary could you start reinforcing or communicating today?

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